This Too Shall Pass
TW - CORONAVIRUS
We, as humans, have felt a constant need to recognize, evaluate, and label our emotions. This primarily stems from the notion that pinpointing the cause of what’s bothering you can help cope with it better. However, with the way that things have been progressing globally, articulating what you’re feeling is strenuous and demanding. Many a time, our mind is so full of pondering thoughts, emotions, vague ideas, and concepts, it feels like a whirlwind of confusion, rattling and roaring wanting to be let out. Since the onset of the pandemic, things inevitably haven’t been the same and an impending sense of uncertainty has left us all disoriented. Emotions are inherently complex and with everything that’s been going on, we often get so overwhelmed, we are unaware of what we’re feeling and that’s completely alright. Give yourself time to process everything because you deserve it, you really do.
Even though we are all mourning the pandemic collectively, each loss is unique. An important aspect that I cannot emphasize enough is that no matter what the nature of your loss is, your grief is valid. You are allowed to be “too sad” about something that seems minuscule to someone else. Do not invalidate what you’re going through just because society judges it as “less significant” or “not as bad” as what others are going through. Don’t let that little voice in your head guilt you into believing that you have no right being this sad. More often than not, society fails to acknowledge and view the sorrow that is consuming you, and this invalidation of grief by social norms makes it extremely difficult to express your anguish without fear of judgement. Disenfranchised grief occurs when you experience loss but believe that you do not have the right to grieve it. This belief makes it burdensome to sort through your emotions and makes coping with grief a very painful process. I’m sorry if what you’ve been through has ever been ignored, invalidated, or even dismissed by others. I’m sorry if you were made to believe that you were overreacting or if you were just told to “suck it up” and I’m especially sorry if society has made it difficult for you to accept and acknowledge that your grief is valid. One is entitled to as much time as you need to grieve, no one has the right to set a time limit on a bereaved person’s freedom to grieve their loss.
Over the past few months, we all have become well aware of what burnouts are. It is sad that I made this statement with so much certainty but the truth is, they have become a major part of our life. There is a constant promise that very soon, life will return to normalcy, however, the will to wait patiently is waning rapidly and a surprisingly large portion of the world is experiencing pandemic burnout. The WHO has defined this as “pandemic fatigue”.
Uncertainty and unpredictability of the pandemic are major causes of the anxiety and fatigue that encircle burnout. When things are unpredictable, it leads to a sense of loss of control over one’s life. People feel helpless as now their future no longer lies in their own hands. Everything seems to be spinning out of control with no end in sight. This constant state of apprehension and foreboding pushes people to the brink of exhaustion. Burnouts, coupled with media hysteria have led us to believe that things will forever be this way and that there is no way out of this situation. I think it’s high time we remind ourselves that a seemingly unusual reaction to an uncommon situation like a pandemic is acceptable, it is okay if you haven’t been feeling like yourself lately and it’s only normal to feel this way in such a complex circumstance.
Recently, I came across a term called “liminality”. The term refers to the transition between two major stages in life and how we navigate the paths between different life stages. I think this could be a beautiful analogy when applied to the context of the pandemic. You are continually waiting for an outcome i.e., a definite end to the pandemic but while doing so, you have to deal with the ever so difficult task of balancing your intrusive thoughts, uncertainty, anxiety, and the overall fear of living in a time where so much that could affect your life isn’t in your hand. Working on our capacity of being okay with “not knowing” and letting go of things that are not in our control is the only way ahead.
Rethinking our relationship and dependence on certainty might help us gain perspective and deal more effectively with the tornado of emotions that we’re facing. However, changing the way you look at and perceive things is far from easy, so while doing so remember to take it easy on yourself and treat yourself with kindness. And know that we, as a world, collectively, can and will get through this.
About The Author
Meherzeen Siganporia, Member of the PsyCreative Column
Psychology Committee, SDSOS, NMIMS
Meherzeen Siganporia is an 18-year-old student of Psychology who is passionate about photography, reading, and writing. She absolutely loves cycling to the beach and is always down for anything impulsive and adventurous. If having deep, intellectual conversations is your thing, she is your go - to girl.
Image Source: Pixabay
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